


Grey Scale

by icashedin



Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Cheating, Domestic Fluff, Drunk Texting, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-10-20
Packaged: 2018-04-24 03:27:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4903822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icashedin/pseuds/icashedin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where there is light, there is also dark. <br/>Seth thinks he can handle it all when he starts a side-relationship with captivating stranger Dean Ambrose, despite already being in a committed relationship with Roman Reigns.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing a bit of Rolleigns.  
> Enjoy (:

Sunlight spills through the strategically pulled-back ivory curtains. Seth tilts his head and admires how the light perfectly complements the pale lemon bedspread he recently picked out. A bulky leather suitcase plops down in the middle of the bedspread ruining Seth’s view.

“Can’t you get out of this one Ro?” Seth whines, watching Roman pull a salmon colored button-down from the closet and neatly placing it at the bottom of the suitcase.  
“I would if I could,” Roman answers softly while tucking a gray dress shirt into the suitcase next.  
Seth gazes into the suitcase and remembers the first time he saw Roman in that exact gray shirt.

 

_The steel doors of the elevator almost clip him as Seth quickly slides in. Music blasting in his headphones, oblivious to the world, his shoulder connects with something thick and unmovable. Seth stumbles back, realizing he collided with someone. When Seth looks up a pair of cool gray eyes catch his and an unexpected warmth spreads from the tip of his nose down to his sneaker-clad feet. Seth fumbles with his headphones, finally able to hook them around his neck, “I-sorry.”_  
_The heat on his cheeks is almost hot enough to scald him and he knows the other man can tell._  
_“No worries. Are you in a rush?”_  
_Seth keeps his eyes on the gray dress shirt that matches the man’s eyes hypnotically so and mutters, “Um…yeah.”_  
_A large well-groomed hand extends into Seth’s field of vision and the deep voice offers an introduction, “My name’s Roman.”_  
_Seth takes a shallow breath and nervously his eyes venture upwards at the man standing a couple inches above him. Dark hair in a tight bun at the nape of his neck, a strong jawline, and plump lips begging Seth for attention._  
_“Seth…that’s me.” Seth garbles out embarrassed at his inability to produce words and shakily grasps Roman’s hand._  
_Seth’s hand freezes as the warmth in his body becomes a fire. Roman’s eyes soften and he shakes Seth’s still hand._  
_“It’s nice to meet you Seth.”_  
_The sincerity of the smile that Roman then gave Seth solidified to him, even at twenty-three, that he needed Roman and only Roman._  
_He had found love._

  
The shrill ringing of Roman’s cell phone stirs Seth out of his daydream. Seth notices that Roman ignores the phone and continues with the last of his packing.  
“Aren’t you going to answer it?”  
“No, I told them I was spending the evening with you. They can leave a message.”

After five years, Seth only has one problem as he stares up at his boyfriend: Roman’s job. Roman, a mere six years Seth’s senior, is a media consultant. He has worked extremely hard to be one of the best in his field so he travels frequently. Seth is always the first to say how proud he is of Roman and the dedication and hard work Roman has put in over the years, but on those nights when Seth rolls over and the right side of the bed is empty Seth can’t help but resent Roman’s job for keeping him away.

Roman lowers the suitcase lid and zips it shut, then looks at Seth, “I’ll be back soon sweetie.”  
Despite the soothing nature of Roman’s voice, Seth is only further riled up by Roman’s statement. He launches himself at Roman. Roman catches Seth and wraps his arms around the smaller man’s body.  
Seth deeply inhaling the clean fresh scent of his boyfriend, as if needing to commit it to memory, cries, “I hate it! I hate that you _always_ leave me!”  
Roman gently lowers himself and Seth onto the mattress. “I work hard now but one day we will spend every day like this, _together_.”  
Seth traces the intricate tattooed patterns along Roman’s well-defined arm and murmurs, “I don’t like sharing.”

Roman kisses Seth’s forehead and smoothes his multi-colored messy hair back. He lovingly stares into Seth’s brown eyes, wishing he didn’t have to leave again. Roman hates to see how with each trip the signs of loneliness appear along the edges of Seth’s mouth and the corners of his eyes sooner. He cups Seth’s face, drawing him closer, and his lips brush lightly along Seth’s. The grip Seth has along Roman’s neck tightens and his breath hitches in his throat. Roman pauses once more taking in his the sight of his flushed partner, then he closes his eyes, and his lips heavy with desire smack against Seth’s. An ardent moan escapes from Seth’s mouth as he hungrily reciprocates Roman’s movements. There is an urgency behind Seth’s swollen lips tonight and Roman spots the difference. Breaking away from Seth’s wet parted mouth, Roman trails his tongue deliberately down the side of Seth’s necks.  
Seth squirms under him and breathes heavily into Roman’s dark wavy hair, “Ro…please.”  
“We have all night. I don’t need sleep.”  
Roman doesn’t hear a response. Instead Seth curls his legs around Roman and raises himself up against Roman, grinding his fully erect cock and eliciting a low growl from Roman.  
“I need to feel you now.” Seth pleads.  
Roman inches back up to Seth’s face, locking eyes with him and whispers, “I will give you everything you need my love.”

***

Shivering, Seth rolls over onto his left side and mumbles into the pillow, “Gimmie the blanket.”  
Eyes still shut and feeling no blanket being tossed to him, Seth tiredly paws at the space in front of him. Realizing that there is a dent in the bed and no one hogging the blankets this morning, Seth whimpers and rolls into Roman’s unoccupied side of the bed. He forgoes the search for the rest of the bed sheet and wraps his arms around himself trying to lull himself back to sleep before the ache of solitude sets in.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks y'all for the hits and kudos thus far.  
> It really means a lot.  
> Every morning when I take my walks, I love to discuss my characters (and future fic ideas) so to see interest in my writing makes me all warm and fuzzy. 
> 
> Enjoy (:  
> Chapter 3 is already finished and should be up in 3-5 days.

Seth struts into the new bar full of confidence. To him, these places are all the same: dark, full of secret corners, and brimming with eager men desperate for attention. Seth surveys the territory, a smirk curling his lips upwards, and switches his phone from loud to silent. The first time he went out, he felt a sting of guilt thinking of the wonderful partner he has, but Seth quickly found a way to justify these outings.

_Everyone needs to feel special every now and then. I’m giving these men something they want. I already know I’m special._

After some easily acquired drinks and limited small talk, Seth turns towards the rugged man in a leather jacket who has had eyes on him for most of the night. He meets the man’s gaze and is struck immediately by a need to hear the man's voice. Anticipation pools in the pit of Seth’s stomach as he reaches the man.

Seth tries to sound nonchalant as he uses his go-to line, “Hi, buy me a drink.”  
Even if all the lights had gone out right then, Seth would still be able to see the intensity of the man’s glacier-blue eyes.  
The man chuckling at Seth, “Tell me your name first.”  
Seth, caught off-guard, gives the stranger a pout before answering, “I’m Seth.”  
There is a pause and Seth’s golden brown eyes have an opportunity to take in the figure standing before him.

“Usually in a conversation you’d ask for mine,” the man interrupts Seth’s thoughts.  
Seth blushes, his attention brought back from places they do not typically wander to, and he is all the more captivated with the stranger in front of him.  
“Well, what is it?” Seth asks inching closer and inhaling an oddly pleasant smoky aroma.  
“Dean. Still want that drink?”  
Seth nods, letting Dean lead him to the bar, his eyes focusing on Dean’s ass.

Closing time hits, Seth stumbles back not realizing how much liquor he has had until then. Dean, with a small smile, quietly watches the younger man try to chug a glass of water and frowns when he isn’t instantly sober.

"Needa ride?"  
Seth blinks at Dean's question and then rapidly nods. Dean loosely wraps an arm around Seth's waist and helps him out of the door.

Seth crawls into the passenger seat of Dean's car fumbling with the seat belt. A clicking sound confuses Seth until he looks over to see Dean in the driver's seat. Seth grabs Dean's hand and places it over his seat belt. Dean holds Seth's soft hand. Seth's stomach does a tiny flip and his face flushes to a brighter red.

"I can't believe you came up to me."

Seth bites down on his lower lip, thinking of something to say. The light in the compact car shuts off, leaving both men to rely upon the sparse lighting coming in from the parking lot. Dean edges closer to Seth, the tension in the air palpable. Seth mirrors Dean's body movement and Dean registers the flicker across Seth’s glassy eyes.

Heart pounding in his chest, Dean bridges the gap between them and firmly presses his lips against Seth's. Seth stiffens in the seat, frozen by the thought of another man's lips on his. Dean's eyes pop open, confusion lining his face as he pulls away. Before he can formulate an apology, Seth roughly grabs his face and kisses him back. It is quick and sloppy. Dean feels Seth’s warm breath against his face. He waits anxiously for the younger man to do something.

Seth is confronted by the stomach flip again. Tentatively, Seth brushes his lips against Dean’s. Whatever had left him frozen initially has thawed and all that remains is a need to taste the man he’s sharing the confined space with. Seth glides his tongue across Dean’s lips. A groan is heard as Seth’s tongue slips into Dean’s mouth. Dean, struggling to be closer, blindly roots around his lap for the seat belt latch. Able to get closer to Seth now, Dean breaks the kiss and lightly drags his lips to Seth’s neck.  
  
He kisses below Seth’s earlobe and husks, “D’ya know how fucking beautiful you are?”  
  
Seth tilts his neck towards Dean’s lips. He closes his eyes, a blissful expression on his face, as Dean continues to trail kisses down his neck murmuring things that keep the flushed coloring stay in his cheeks.

The windows of the car are fogged over but neither of them could care. Seth’s breathing picks up as Dean’s hand splays over the raised area of his jeans. Seth moves his hips up, hungry for more of Dean’s touch.

“Want’chu…” Seth slurs, running a hand through Dean’s dirty blonde hair.  
Dean chews at his lip, not believing what he wants to say next.  
His hand drifts away from Seth’s jeans, “This isn’t all I want,” and strokes Seth’s cheek.  
The younger man whimpers at the loss of contact.  
“Lemme take you home,” Dean sighs trying to control himself.

Somehow Seth is able to direct Dean to a quaint-looking house on a quiet street.  
“I wanna see you again. Here,” Dean says handing Seth his phone.  
Seth heavy-handedly types in his number, “Do it…soon.”  
“Better not be a fake,” Dean half-jokes as Seth gets out of the car.  
Seth giggles and closes the car door. Dean waits until the younger man makes it safely inside the house and then drives off with the thought of Seth’s lips still stinging his.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean steals a glance at his date. He tries to stifle back a chuckle when he spots a gleam in Seth’s eyes as he watches the monkeys fling around inside the enclosure. Seth, hearing the other man’s laugh, blushes when he turns to find Dean’s eyes on him.

“What?!”  
“Nothin’, surprised you picked a zoo s’all,” Dean shrugs looking back at the monkeys.  
“I like animals.” Seth says defensively, dropping Dean’s hand and stomping away from him.  
“As long as there’s no snakes…” Dean mutters.  
Seth stops his impromptu fit and flings his head back at Dean, not worried about the strands of hair coming loose from his bun.  
A wide grin spreads across Seth’s face as he teases, “You’re afraid of snakes! How old are you, five?”  
Dean stands taller and puffs up his chest, “Thirty-one…and I _didn’t_ say afraid...”  
Seth tilts his head and thoughtfully gazes at Dean before he loudly whispers, “If we come across any, I’ll protect you.”  
“Aren’t you adorable,” Deans rolls his eyes and replies playfully.  
Seth reaches out and grabs Dean’s hand. He squeezes his hand and beams back at the older man, “Obviously, now I wanna see some pretty birds. Let’s go.”

Dean shakes his head and smiles to himself, enjoying a simple day at the zoo with this man he barely knows but can’t get enough of already. Seth leans over the wooden railing and stares at the flamingos, rattling off something to Dean about the difference between males and females.  
“Do you do this a lot?” Dean cuts Seth off.  
“Whatcha mean?”  
“Sorry, I mean do you like animals?”

Seth bites his bottom lip, his eyes trailing down looking at the lake where some of the males are standing, and tries to figure out how to answer Dean. This urge sweeps through Seth, compelling him to tell Dean everything but he reminds himself that he has little to divulge, not to mention some information best kept quiet.

“I’ve got a lot of hobbies,” Seth calmly remarks still staring at the lake.  
Dean places a hand over Seth’s and softly laughs when a silence passes between them, “Wow, I’ve got some too. I also work, but thanks for asking.”  
Seth’s face turns a bright shade of red as he clears his throat, “I don’t work. I, uh, I’m in school a lot and do a lot of stuff. I guess that’s what I meant. Um, what do you do?”  
“Middle school gym teacher. What do you go to scho--”  
Seth eyes him lustfully and cuts Dean off this time, “If you were my teacher in school…”

***

Once Dean closes the front door of his apartment, Seth wedges Dean between the door and his body. Seth grips Dean’s waist with one hand, pulling himself closer, and with the back of his other hand he slowly caresses down the right side of Dean’s face.  
“Can I call you Mr. Ambrose?” Seth asks in a low breathy voice.  
Dean grunts and Seth, not able to decipher what the answer is, husks, “Mr. Ambrose, tell me what you what.”

The older man grabs Seth’s hair, releasing the bun it is in, as well as a yelp from Seth. Not yet wanting to release Dean, Seth grinds his hips against the others. A slight twitching from Dean’s jeans tells Seth to continue. However, as quickly as Seth believes he has gained some control, Dean removes Seth’s shirt and lowers his head to swirl his tongue over the other man’s nipple. Seth’s head dips back and his eyes close as he moans. Dean raises his head and trails his tongue up Seth’s pecs, making the man shiver.

Dean then says, in that deliciously raspy voice that could alone make Seth hard, “I want you in my bed.”

Seth whimpers in response and goes completely limp in Dean’s firm grasp, allowing Dean to have his way. Expertly, Dean peels off his shirt while switching spots with Seth. The need building up inside of Seth is nearly suffocating him. His heart is thumping loudly against his chest. His wide eyes now fixated solely upon Dean’s perfect pink lips.

“Kiss me…” Seth hears himself whisper in his transfixed state.

Dean smirks, narrowing his eyes deviously, and he slinks an arm up Seth’s back. Pulling Seth into him, Dean nips at his neck. Seth’s knees lock together momentarily and he tries to string something together but words fail him. Dean’s breath along his neck sends a warm sensation throughout his body. Seth forces himself to open his eyes more and see how close the bedroom is. He needs more, and now. Impatiently, Seth uses his hips to try pushing Dean towards the bedroom. Dean’s hand travels down the curve of Seth’s spine, when he reaches Seth’s plump ass he takes a handful , drawing a desperate sound from Seth’s mouth. Dean brings his lips right over Seth’s but he doesn’t offer Seth relief. Instead Dean’s lips linger there teasing Seth as Dean takes off his pants, inching them closer to the bedroom in the process. Seth anxiously moves his hands to his pants and Dean takes Seth’s hand placing it on his back.

“Behave,” Dean quietly scolds against Seth’s lip, giving the younger man a small peck.

Seth dreamily stares into Dean’s eyes, barely able to register his tight jeans being tugged off. Dean puts a hand back onto Seth’s, now bare, ass giving it a smack. His other hand cradles the nape of Seth’s neck as he guides him through the doorway into the bedroom. Dean mouths something against Seth’s lips but due to the need already pooling in the pit of his stomach he isn’t paying attention. With unexpected ease, Seth feels himself being rotated and then lowered onto Dean’s bed. He sinks into the soft bedspread and the mattress dips as Dean joins Seth, part of his body weight resting on Seth. Their lips, never breaking the almost kissing distance, finally connect. Dean closes his lips over Seth’s. The younger man’s whole body reacts. His hands claw at Dean’s back. His mouth opens slightly so he can both groan at the surprising feeling of liberation that floods through him and sneak his tongue into Dean’s mouth. His head is spinning and he knows that if he opens his eyes Dean would be too much to look at. He keeps his eyes shut as Dean’s mouth opens, their tongues gliding over each other’s. Dean’s hands roam over his chest and one begins to make its way lower, past Seth’s happy trail.

Seth, eyes still closed and his arousal feeling almost like intoxication, slurs into the kiss, “NoIneedatasteyou.”  
Dean pecks the side of Seth’s open mouth and husks into his ear, “Who says you can’t after I do what I want?”

Seth gasps and his eyes flutter open to see Dean straddling his thighs as he slowly strokes his perineum. Dean winks at Seth, lifting a hand off his thigh and bringing it to his mouth, seductively Dean licks his hand. Seth’s eyes widen and his breath catches in his throat. Dean pleased with Seth’s reaction, loosely wraps his hand around Seth’s throbbing cock. Seth, with a small cry, jerks up in Dean’s hand. Blue eyes locked on Seth’s, Dean begins to knowingly stroke the younger man. The small of Seth’s back arches as his eyes roll back in ecstasy.

“Oh fuck—Dean!” Seth squeals as Dean tenderly tugs on Seth’s balls.

Dean picks up the speed of his strokes and Seth’s breath becomes shallow and uneven. A jolt spreads through Seth as Dean grips him with his other hand as well, working his over with two hands, one going the full-length of his cock and one focusing solely on the tip. Seth struggles to call out Dean’s name as his orgasm rapidly approaches. Seth cums, garbling slightly before he goes slack and a blissed-out expression makes its way across his face.

“I like how you came for me,” Dean growls and licks his lips.

Seth, a silly grin adorning his face, looks up at Dean. He clumsily flings himself at Dean and ends up slamming his forehead into the older man’s. An embarrassingly high-pitched whining noise automatically comes from Seth’s throat. Dean brushes his wavy hair back with a low chuckle and then pulls Seth back in and plants a gentle kiss on the developing red mark on his forehead.

Seth shakes Dean off and seductively commands, “Lay down, _now_.”

Dean falls back and nestles himself into the bed sheet. Seth grabs Dean’s thighs and spreads Dean’s legs far apart. He lustfully admires the man’s thick cock before tightly grabbing ahold of it; Seth’s excitement getting the better of him. Dean lets out a hiss and Seth loosens his grip, trying to relax. After a few more pumps, Seth drops his head and rotates his tongue around the tip of Dean’s dick. Dean groans and Seth has to use his other hand to dig his nails into Dean’s thigh. The barely audible sounds coming from Dean are making it hard for Seth to concentrate, his need is beginning to consume him once more. He is conflicted between the desire to have Dean all over him once more or watching as he makes Dean come undone. Making his mind up quickly, Seth sloppily takes all of Dean’s thickness in at once. Seth moans against Dean’s hard flesh as Dean yanks on Seth’s hair to guide the rhythm of his sucking. Sooner than Dean expected, Seth has him on the brink and he is losing his grip on the other man’s hair. Seth’s tongue remains flattened against the side of Dean’s aching dick as he bobs his head up and down building speed.

“That mouth, Seth…” Dean groans before his hand falls through the blond strands of Seth’s hair.

*** 

Dean carelessly tosses the washcloth onto the floor and glances over at Seth. The younger man’s eyes are shut, a hand is splayed across his chest, and the bedsheet is covering only one of his well-defined legs. Dean cocks his head to the side and his lips curve up into a lopsided smile while he climbs into the bed. He tucks a few loose pieces of hair behind Seth’s ear and Seth unconsciously smiles in return, solidifying to Dean that it’s the perfect moment.

“Wanna spend the night?” Dean asks, laying down next to Seth.

The image of an empty lemon colored king sized bed flashes through Seth’s mind. A cold chill creeps over him so he rolls over, curling into the heat radiating off of Dean’s body. Dean further tucks Seth into him by wrapping an arm around him and bringing the sheets up over them. Seth’s leg coils around Dean’s and he hears a content sigh come from the quiet man. Dean mouths, “Goodnight” into Seth’s hair and lightly kisses the top of his head.

While comfortably drifting to sleep in the warm embrace of the shaggy blond haired man, Seth is unable to hear his phone stubbornly vibrate from the back pocket of his dark jeans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got carried away with this chapter.  
> Honestly, I am just enthralled with this story and these characters.  
> The kudos, hits, bookmarks, everything makes me smile.  
> Thank you all for the support and encouragement.  
> I have chapter four ready and chapter five is in the works. (:


	4. Chapter 4

Roman swipes through the PowerPoint presentation on his tablet, indifference building steadily. His gaze travels from the screen to Seth, the younger man’s head resting on his lap. Seth, stuck on page twenty-seven of his book, stares out into the distance. His mind far away from the plot of the novel in his hands.

_What I would give to know what has been bothering him..._

Seth encouraged them setting up the backyard for lazy afternoons. Laying around together, even in silence, reconfirmed to Roman how strong their relationship has remained despite his constant traveling. Over the past three months, even days like this one shows the effects of Seth's growing loneliness.

_Even today I’m working. How much time do I really spend with him?_

Roman attempts to soothe his mind by gliding his fingers through Seth’s soft hair.Seth stirs at the unanticipated touch. He hastily thumbs to the next page in his book, tucking his feet into the cushion of the green sectional.

"Is everything alright?" Roman asks cautiously.  
Seth nods his head, gently shaking Roman.  
Roman switches off his tablet, tucks it between the cushion and his hip as he looks down at Seth and begins, "I've noticed lately that you seem..."  
Roman pauses briefly while Seth aggressively flips the page of the book he's holding.  
"...to be lonely and it's worrying me." Roman finishes and cups Seth's cheek.  
Seth remains silent but gazes up, those cool gray eyes meeting his tawny brown ones.  
The calm intensity in Roman’s eyes draws a response out of Seth, "Don't worry 'bout me."  
Roman's hand slides down and carefully takes the book out of Seth's hand. After placing the book on Seth's chest, Roman laces both of his hands around Seth's and says, "I know I've been away more sweetie."  
Seth strokes Roman's hands with his thumbs, "It is fine. Ok?"  
Roman grips Seth's hands rougher than usual, "No, it's not fine 'cause I love you. I'm putting in for vacation. I don't wanna see you so lonely."

Roman didn’t anticipate the pinched face and confusion shining through Seth’s eyes. Not knowing how to respond to Seth, Roman sinks into himself momentarily.

_How much is he hurting? I always come home to him. He knows I love him._

While waiting for Roman to say something, Seth closes his eyes and instantly a pair of wild blue eyes flashes across his mind.

“You don’t want that sweetie?” Roman’s question bringing Seth back into their backyard, back to a pair of cool gray eyes.  
“I do need more of you Ro.” Seth coos, cuddling his body tightly against Roman.  
 “Good. Now pick where we'll go and I’ll have the dates soon,” Roman replies, stifling a sigh.   
Roman lightly grazes his lips along the crown of Seth’s head before he resumes running his large fingers gradually through Seth’s hair.   
Seth semi-consciously smiles and whispers, “Love you Ro.”

****  
Dean: _Hey beautiful_  
Seth: _My Dean (: Hi_  
Dean: _What are u doin?_  
Seth: _Missin u_  
Dean: _Come see me_  
Seth: _I cant ):_  
Dean: _Why not? I tried textin u all afternoon  
_ Seth: _I kno (;_

Seth tucks his phone in his back pocket, walking into the spare room Roman uses as his office. Roman is hunched over the mahogany desk, a hand tensely raised near the dark knot of hair at the top of his head. Seth knows this scene very well so he tentatively approaches the massive man, smoothly resting his head on Roman’s shoulder.

“Ro?”  
Roman grunts, waiting for Seth to continue.  
“How much longer do ya got?”  
“Dunno. Couple hours. Maybe more. All depends sweetie,” Roman answers impatiently.  
“I won’t bother you anymore Ro, sorry.” Seth kisses the side of Roman’s neck.   
He hears a quiet release of breath from the bigger man as he leaves the room.

Seth: _How soon ya need me (;_  
Dean: _Now!_ _I’ve got a surprise for you_  
Seth: _Y didn’t u say so sooner!!!!_

Seth’s knuckles barely lift from the door before it wildly swings open and Dean’s face appears in front of him.

“You arrived fast,” Dean says cheerfully.  
“Where’s my surprise?” Seth smirks, his eyes sparkling with anticipation.

Dean takes Seth by the hand and leads him into his apartment. Seth's smirk fades instantly. His mouth goes dry as he scans the small living space packed with candles. He swallows but is cut off by a hard lump in his throat. Uneasiness churns in his stomach as Seth thinks of Roman bent over at his desk at home.

“Surprise!” Dean exclaims, unable to mask his excitement.  
“Uh, what’s all this?” Seth mumbles lowly.

Dean smiles widely, dimples on full display, as he rambles on about his day spent planning and plotting. Seth releases his hand from Dean’s grip, wiping the cold sweat on the front of his jeans.

_He's on a rant. Maybe I could slip out the door._

“Well I tried cookin’ but it burned…fuck it, right? The food I picked up is from a good place and look at these candles…” Dean trails off looking expectantly at Seth.

Seth’s eyes roam over the apartment again, forcing his lips into an awkward smile. His chest beginning to feel tight and uncomfortable.

“Candles,” Seth repeats the last word.

Dean wraps an arm around Seth’s shoulder, steering him to the dinner table. He brushes his fingers along Seth’s upper arm and chuckles.

“No sense in being shy now,” Dean winks.

 

Seth pokes his chicken parmigiana with his fork.

_Turns out I don’t like surprises…_

“Do you like the dinner? I thought you would.”  
“It’s fine,” Seth says flatly.  
“Do you cook? Maybe you can make dinner for us next time.”  
Seth’s eyes widen with panic and his jaw becomes stiff.  
“Are you a shitty cook too? That’s alright…”

_No, I’m shitty at this. Why are you still talking?_ Seth thinks as his chest rapidly rises and falls.  
  
“I have dessert. You have to be a good boy though finish your food though,” Dean jokes.  
“What is with you?” Seth snaps.  
“I wanted to show you how much I care. This is what people in relationships do Seth.” Dean says sincerely.  
“ _Relationship_ ,” Seth’s face turns pale, the idea horrifying him.  
“Me and you, together…a relationship. Isn’t that what we have?” Dean asks, confusion clouding his eyes.  
Seth drops his fork and swiftly stands up.  
His voice is harsh and low as he finally looks Dean in the eyes and spats out, “You're good in bed but you don’t mean a thing to me.”

Dean, glued to his seat by disbelief and oncoming grief, watches Seth storm out of his apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter five is already completed.  
> I'll try to post that up sooner than I did this chapter.
> 
> All the support and love shown to this work is appreciated.  
> I'm excited to share more with y'all soon. (:


	5. Chapter 5

Unhinged by grief, Dean paces around the living room of his apartment. He snatches his phone off the scuffed coffee table, not bothering to check for a notification, and hits redial.

“Fucking voicemail again…” Dean’s voice dejected as he stares at the screen, not knowing or caring if Seth’s voicemail picked up what he mumbled.

It wouldn’t even make the list of what he’s left Seth in the past seven days. Dean slides his phone into the front pocket of his jeans. Roughly rubbing at the back of his neck, Dean realizes he needs to see Seth.

_If only he’d answer me, I miss him. He has to miss me too, right?_

Dean huffs, snatching his leather jacket off the blanket-covered couch. He stuffs his arms through the sleeves of the jacket. His face settling into hard lines of determination as he slams the door behind him.

Without the company of a cute slurring passenger, Dean realizes the drive to Seth's house is not as long as it seemed the first time. Biting back a sigh, Dean shuts off the ignition and looks into the rear view mirror. He is shocked by the unfamiliar man in the reflection. Staring back at him is a scared man, with red-rimmed eyes, who has been stripped of his bravado and is now shivering in a new raw layer of vulnerability.

_This is due to you. I need you._

Dean forcefully inhales, flicking a stray strand of hair out of his eyes, and gets out of the car. He moves slowly towards the wooden door with glass paneling. After a couple hesitant steps, he notices a stream of artificial light pouring through one of the front windows, the curtains still pulled half-open. Curiosity tugs at Dean like a tiny impatient child. He snaps his neck, taking a quick peek inside the room. His heart flies into his throat when he sees Seth. His feet become stuck to the pavement, eyes roaming all over Seth and his glowing features. A smile appearing on Dean’s lips for the first time in a week. In the corner, Dean picks up on some movement. His smile twists and his eyes fill with gloom as he sees another man walk up to Seth and Seth’s glow intensifies.

“Holy fuck, he’s a goddamn Adonis…” Dean mutters as his heart drops into his stomach.

He rushes back to the safety of his car, praying neither Seth nor Seth’s Adonis spotted him. Dean turns back to look at the scene near the window. He is hypnotized, unable to tear away, even though the heart in is stomach is being dissolved by acid. Seth is smiling and laughing, playfully throwing something at the man.

“You’ve got yourself tall, dark, and fuckin’ handsome at home, eh Seth?” Dean rolls his eyes, anger and self-pity pickling his skin.

Dean glances in the rear view mirror, unable to resist the urge to compare himself, but self-pity doesn't play fair. He wrinkles his nose in disgust and groans loudly. Shaking his head, he gazes at Seth, who has his arms wrapped around the towering muscular man. Dean’s eyes lower from the two men and he notices a suitcase.

“Adonis probably does take you on perfect fucking trips!” Dean cries, the frustration and humiliation overwhelming him.

Dean buries his head in his hands as he sorts through his thoughts.

_How could I be so fucking stupid? Why would he love me when he has him? Who the fuck am I?_

Dean sluggishly raises his head from his hands, turning for a final look. Seth is kissing the wrong man. Dean’s head is pounding, his vision beginning to blur. In a swift motion, he turns the car on and whips onto the main street. Dean, in a daze, stumbles into the closest bar. He spots a booth in the back and slides in, appreciating the irony of the rip down the middle of the seat. Cradling the cold glass near his lips, he bitterly laughs to himself.

_First time I’m at the bar and not looking to score. What have you fuckin’ done to me Rollins?_

Two hours later, Dean palms around the pocket of his jacket, muttering noisily, searching for his phone. Spotting it on the table, he awkwardly swipes his thumb across a photo Dean keeps forgetting to change. Dean’s chest tightens, the room tilting to the left slightly, as he struggles to compose a text message.

Dean: _I could stil maakeuyo hpy. Iloveyou. YOupickd me. cHoseme now. Please._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once fall semester is over, I may do a sequel.  
> I have bounced around some ideas.  
> I hope y'all enjoyed this fic as much as I have enjoyed writing it.  
> I seriously cannot get enough of writing Seth, Dean, and Roman. (:  
> && Thank you all for the kudos, comments, hits, bookmarks, and support in general. It means a lot!
> 
> For now, I am just messing with drabble prompts/one-shots.


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